If you were born in the late 70s or early 80s, you too have most likely visited the psychiatrist to try and erase the painfully disturbing memories of movies from the 80s. Just about every film made from 1980 to 1990 had the same underlying theme: sci-fi fantasy crap mixed with children in danger, bad singing, and unexplained and unnecessary horrible situations and characters. Here are 10 of the most disturbing films of my childhood:
Labyrinth (1986)
David Bowie is Weird. Jim Henson is Weird. Put them both together and you get a staple fantasy-drag-opera with puppets. If that isn't disturbing enough - The baby in this film gets kidnapped by evil goblin things - Disturbing? Yeah, we're just getting started - near the end of the film they put the baby in the middle of this troll palace, and David Bowie sings to it. One of the lines in this song is "slap that baby make him free!" Watching this movie as an adult made me mad. Watching it as a kid gave me nightmares.
Little Shop of Horrors (1986)
Besides the horror of a man eating plant - this movie explores such innocent topics like: masochism, huffing, sadism, abuse - and worst of all - Rick Moranis.... singing.... This movie disturbed me as a kid because murder and chopping people up were being sung about like Bigbird would sing about butterflies. Why did they let us watch this as kids!? If your not convinced - just watch the dentist song scene:
The Goonies (1985)
Ok so I have to admit that The Goonies is a cult classic. This movie has some great parts - but the most disturbing part watching this as a kid was seeing "Sloth", an obviosly semi-retarded disfigured person tied up in a dungeon by his mother and teased and tormented by his siblings. Why is he retarded? Oh - good ol' "Ma" dropped him on his head a few times when he was a baby. Funny! Huh! I was also somewhat disturbed as a kid when Rosalita the maid starts talking about sexual torture devices.... I was about 5 years old when I watched this one for the first time!
Pee Wees Big Adventure(1985)
This clip explains it all.
All Dogs go to Heaven(1989)
The same year that "The Little Mermaid" came out, Universal Pictures released a wonderful little kids flick that dealt with death, violence, drinking, smoking, gambling, demons and Hell. The most disturbing part that still gives me nightmares is the scene where a building-size demon is lifting up rooftops looking for the main character "Charlie." Every night I waited for that same demon to open up my roof looking for me! Thanks a lot Universal Pictures!
The Secret of NIMH(1982)
Oh this "G" rates flick will be just fine! Lets see: A group of rats at an animal testing facility receive drugs that ultimately make them smart, and, of course - horribly ugly. Just check out old Nicodemus- He looks friendly! The drugs also make them unable to move out of their stupid rose bush when a plow is about to remove it.
Legend (1985)
This one got a PG rating! I'm sure you would agree with its rating after watching the preview to this wonderful little flick starring Tom Cruise, and.. Satan.
Return to Oz (1985)
Of all the films I watched as a kid - this one was one of my favorites. I really enjoyed the characters Tik-Tok, a steampunk robot man and Jack Pumpkin Head. But this movie gets a place on my list for the very unnerving room full of heads given to witch Mombi by the Nome King. Creeeeeepy! Oh and the electric shock therapy for Dorothy at the beginning of the film settles well with most kids.
The Last Unicorn (1982)
My sister-in-law who also grew up in the 80s had this to say about this flick - "(The Last Unicorn) was one of the most disturbing, I swear! especially when the skinny guy gets tied to a tree, facing it of course, & then the large tree turns into a ugly, horny woman with large breasts right where his face is. I mean, come on! Kid film, my butt. There were a lot of moments like that in the Last Unicorn that made me wonder why we were allowed to watch it. The vulture killing the witch was pretty gross. And the firey bull from hell that destroys all unicorns isn't what you would expect from a unicorn cartoon since sweet little girls like unicorns and fantasy, right."
The Dark Crystal (1982)
Skeksis have to be the creepiest things ever imagined. As a kid I remember the horrifying scene where the Skeksi Emperor dies - not sad at all - and then they all go after his staff of authority.
Even though these movies scared the crap out of me as a kid, I have to admit that they are way better than the disgustingly politically correct movies made for kids today. The creative art of movie making is lost with every overly cliché film pooped out of the movie industry each year.
33 comments:
Tyler, you got all of the ones I thought of, except for the Great Land of Small. Good luck finding it, but if you can find it online, let me know.
http://blogs.static.mentalfloss.com/blogs/archives/16069.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Great_Land_of_Small
the plot summary there is almost comprehensive, it's the weirdest, weakest plot I've ever seen.
http://www.canuxploitation.com/review/greatland.html
Well, I'd just like to point out that PG does NOT mean 'okay for 5 year olds', and I was certainly never allowed to watch most of these, or things like this, until I was 12 or 13. I also wouldn't say that Little Shop of Horrors was created for children, just because it had song and dance in it. It was for adults but without any particular huge adult themes to it, plus light hearted and funny and a musical. Just because kids aren't legally banned from watching it because it had a PG rating, that does not make it a movie for children.
Ok, it predates the 80's by two years- but Watership Down win the prize hands down for the most disturbing, bloodiest, and most frightening movies about cartoon bunnies ever made. Just watch the gory ending of rabbits being torn to shreds in slow motion- you will be amazed this was a movie made FOR KIDS.
It seems like all of these films were on a constant playlist at the petriches. That's why whenever I went over there I went to all costs to avoid the living room. I think you need to add Willow to this list though. The part where the baby is about to be cut on some rock gave me nightmares for years!
Don't forget Plague Dogs, that's an awesome and "happy" film for any 80s kids lucky enough to see it.
except for legend, those are all great movies. imagination and appreciation of anything slightly offbeat is very often hard to find. they need to make waaaay more childrens movies the way the use to but waaaaaaaaaaay further.
I remember the movie called Willow, which my parents at the time thought was for children. My younger sister ended up crying while watching and had nightmares for a week.
I even remember my Mom berating my Dad for picking it for us and him apologising to us for it.
At the time, being a silly little boy, I thought it was cool, but what little boy wouldn't :P
Nothing compares really to the destruction of my childhood at the hands of the Ewoks.
It's funny, almost every one of these movies is excellent and a total classic. That's probably because kid's movies in the 80's did something that some, but not all, do now: they respected the intelligence of their audience. They said, "This might scare you, but you'll thank me later." And they were right. Mostly.
Also, who is Birdbird?
Point missed on Secret of Nimh mind you. The rats were saving Mrs. Frisby's family from the plow because her husband's the mouse who helped them escape the evil scientists. Justin wasn't a hideous rat. He was noble and brave. Yeah, Nicodemus was a creepfest but the owl was a whole lot worse than him.
how could you forget the peanut butter mystery! creepiest by far!
An above poster mentioned Ewoks. I loved Ewoks but I was terrified of The Ewok Adventure movie. Kid falls in to water, water surface turns solid and traps him underneath. :shiver:
How can Transformers: The Movie (the animated one) NOT be on this list? Every character you grew to love died in the first five minutes of the movie! Scarred a lot of kids I knew for a LONG time.
I think someone said it before. This films don't treat kids like idiots. Now all you can watch for kids' films are stupid cartoons that try to "appeal" to audiences young and old, with puns hardly understood by kids and loved by moronic adults (Shrek anyone?)
Being a kid does not mean you should be spared the horrific, it just means that you might still believe that there are heroes and that good may triumph in the end.
I'll agree, this movies are all sort of "weird" but compared to the films of today, I will take them. Pee Wee's Big Adventure is my favorite movie of all time, ever.
A lot of the movies are not kids' movies specifically, which makes me long for a time when adult movies would have PG ratings. Just because we are old enough doesn't mean good films have to be obscenity-laced, etc.
C. K. Chesterton wrote, "Fairy tales are more than true: not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us dragons can be beaten."
All of those movies you reference all show that a determined person can beat the evil, no matter how scary. That is a lesson that children - especially children - need to learn because our society teaches that there are things to fear out there.
Terrorism, crime, failure, disease, pornography (although why anyone would fear that is beyond me, but they do) all are villainized and held up as examples of bogeymen that will get you if you don't fear them. But the truth is, that the opposite is true. Those things may occur but if you are determined, smart, resourceful and above all NOT AFRAID of them then you can either beat them or better yet avoid them altogether.
Scary movies rock and I believe every child needs to have their socks scared off -- as long as the payoff is that the hero wins in the end by being brave.
I liked these movies as a kid. Sure they were a bit scary sometimes but Nightmare on Elm St was way scarier (my neighbours let me watch that one).
What about Garbage Pail Kids?? Definitely made for kids,.... definitely creepy!!
you forgot the Jabberwocky in "Through the Looking Glass", gave me nightmares for weeks!
How bout Gremlins and Beetlejuice? I mean, Gremlins was one of two movies that spurned the creation of PG(-13) and was the source of much consternation around bedtime.
I will have to agree with what most of you are saying here. I think most are weird and disturbing, they are 100x better than the crap that is being produced today. These movies keep kids imaginations growing and working.
The movies today tend to try to suppress the imagination by making everything pink and bubbly without a hint of danger. I know I LOVED the Goonies, the Dark crystal, the Secret of Nihm etc. The darkness of the creatures and the plots allow your imagination to continue on with it after the story is over.
Plus most boys and girls love the adventure of a good scare :)
Through the looking glass was the only one that gave me nightmares too!!! creepy as sin.
Thanks for the comments everyone! Especially Michael!? Although I can't thank you properly because you are remaining anonymous...
I'm sure I watched most of these as a child. I totally remember watching Little Shop of Horrors when I was around 3 or 4 (and loving it), and to be honest, I didn't remember the demon scene in All Dogs Go to Heaven until you mentioned it.
To Living's comment about PG.. yes, I'd pretty much say that these movies WERE designed for kids.. by the time you're 12 or 13, well, then you're probably already watching PG-13 or R rated movies. I mean, sure, PG implies parental guidance, but maybe kids need to be exposed to more stuff like this these days, especially if it does come with parental guidance...
But I loved all of these movies...
I saw everyone of those movies as a kid and must admit, they scared me silly! My kindergarten class went to the last unicorn in theaters for a field trip.
Please add Water Babies. It starts with a bunch of children all being drowned so they can escape the horrible orphanage they live in.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0078477/
I would have included The Neverending Story or Huga Bunch.
Great list though!!!
:-)
What about the Gmork in The Never Ending Story?
Most of these are my favorite films from that era. Being scared is a normal part of the human experiance and many of these films also have important messages. I think they rock.
I've been scared of dogs, especially alsations, since Gmork from Never Ending Story.
Also, Artex drowning in the quicksand was gutwrencing. This scene made me so upset as a four year old that I felt sick.
80s kids films were amazing - Hallucinatory works of imagination that touched on the unconscious. I think the differences between our generation and that of kids growing up in the 90s and 2000s can be summed up by the differences between the films aforementioned and the cynical products of market research and focus groups being made today (e.g. shrek). It seems that todays kids films need adult subtexts and pop-culture references to get approved by production companies. Sad.
You obviously had a very boring childhood, or were scared far too easily. I found all of these films inspirational, beautiful and completely fantastic in their experimental nature. If they ever looked scary, then perhaps they were meant to be, and that was the fun of them.
I'd certainly must prefer these so-called 'scary' films to the contemporary crap being thrown at kids nowadays. Moronic toxic waste.
All these movies were AWESOME!!!! Never scared me a bit. I also enjoyed Nightmare on Elm Street, Friday the 13th, Halloween, Hellraiser, etc. I was a little girl between 3-9 when I was watching these, so either I'm a lot tougher than most, or you guys were easily scared as children.
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